My God is Good: Our Beautiful & Kind Neighbor

We have lived in Japan for 2 months now. I am sorry I haven't written before now. We have experienced so many emotions since we have been here. At the end of every day, I find my head spinning. Sometimes I'm thinking about what I've learned or have yet to learn, other times about the excitement of seeing Japan, but most often it's spinning with confusion and fatigue. So many days I don't know up from down. So many days I sit down to write to you, but my thoughts are so diffused that I feel they will be more confusing than informative. BUT I can say confidently that God still gently whispers that He is with us all the way. So many times I wish I would have written down exactly how He does this and exactly which prayers He answers, but I find myself wanting to bask in His love in complete silence and alone. I cannot do anything other than sit thankfully in and absorb the comfort of His love as He shows me very clearly that He is here and I am not forgotten. In a world where I am forgetting English as I learn Japanese and feel that I am mostly at a loss of words. In a world where I am learning everything like a child. In this world, I am feeling the language of silence & awe before God. "He says, 'Be still, and know that I am God...'" (Psalm 46:10). Today, however, something happened that makes me want to cry the goodness of God.

Right now, I am amazed at Him. I cannot express the extremity of prayers this experienced has answered.

It was a good day. It started on the way to school when I read an encouraging birthday email from my dad telling me that he was proud of me. Reading this gave me strength. I had a good day at school learning to quilt Japanese patterns. After school, my friend Akiko picked me up, and we went to an udon shop for lunch. We talked for about 2.5 hours, then she drove me home. When I got home, that's when the lately-so-familiar pang of loneliness hit. I remembered that Ryan has to work very late tonight (maybe 9pm or so). I knew in my mind that I am never alone, so I grabbed the book I have been reading. Reading has really helped me here. So far, I have chosen books written by Christians who reinforce my value in God and His love for me using the Bible. This writes the knowledge that I am not alone on my heart. Anyway, I grabbed my book and sat on the couch. I turned on the TV for background noise and to listen to/learn Japanese while I read (osmosis-ish maybe? haha). That's when my doorbell rang.

I opened the door to a woman with 2 small children.
Me: Konichiwa!
Her: Konichiwa! I hope we make friends!
Me: [kind of startled] I hope so too! [not knowing who she was still]
Her: I am sorry so sudden. English little.
Me: Dijobu desu (It's ok)! Sumimasen Nihon-go very little (Sorry, Japanese very little). Ytown ni sunde imasu ka (Do you live in Ytown [our apartment])?
Her: Yes! [she pointed to the next door. I realized she was my neighbor!]
Me: Ahhhh!! Hajime mashite (greeting when meeting someone for the first time)! Amy desu.
Her: Hajime mashite! [I already forget her name:( ] desu. [She pointed to her children and gave me their names]
Me: Yoroshiku onegaishimas (Nice to meet you)
Her: Yoroshiku onegaishimas, Japanese culture...ohinamatsuri?
Me: [confused] moichido (one more time [like "please repeat"]?
Her: [pulling out her phone & using a translation app] Ohinamatsuri decoration (Girls' Day Celebration decoration) [points at her door]
Me: [realizing she is inviting me over] Now?
Her: Hai (yes)!
Me: Daijobu desu ka (Is it ok)?
Her: Hai!
Me: Hai, arigato gozaimasu (Yes, thank you)! Choutto matte kudasai (Please wait a minute). I will get shoes.

She showed me her hina-ningyo decoration (ornamental dolls). Using broken English and her translation app, she explained to me that they put out this decoration when a baby girl is born. "Kirei (beautiful)!" I said. She asked if I knew about sakura mochi, a traditional Japanese dessert. I said yes, and she motioned to a chair at her table, as if asking me to sit down. I thanked her and sat. Everything was in very broken English, but I understood her asking if I wanted ocha (Japanese green tea) or cocha (Chinese tea). "Ocha o kudasai" (green tea please)! She gave me green tea and sakura mochi with red bean paste inside and wrapped in a sakura leaf. We were communicating back and forth trying to get to know one another and watching the kids play. Where are we each from, how long will I be staying here and how long has she been living here, what our occupations were, etc. She explained that she had also knocked on the door Monday, and I told her I was away at school. The kids were shy, but I tried to talk to them. "Konichiwa (hello)! Kore wa nan desu ka (what is this?)" while pointing to toys and trains, etc. I asked if her 2 year old son wanted to study English, so she got out his favorite DVD which was an English learning cartoon! Her 1 year old daughter liked a colorful calendar on the wall and kept asking to see it. She likes animals and liked the giraffe best. I kept pointing at her children and saying, "Kawaii desu (they're cute)!" She said again that she didn't know much English, and I told her again that I didn't know Japanese.  She spoke into her phone translator and showed it to me.  It read something like, "I studied English so I could hopefully talk to you." I wanted to burst into tears. I sat in silence while I stared at her phone and held back tears. Finally all I could say was, "Arigato gozaimasu (thank you)..." It felt like my heart had doubled!

What happened next, you really won't believe. You just won't. I still can't!

She was holding her daughter who looked at me. I smiled and reached my arms out, and her daughter walked to me. So I grabbed her, and her mom caught her breath! She pointed to her daughter with joy on her face and said, "First walking!"

WHAT?! SERIOUSLY?

Me: HAJIMATE (first time)?!?!?!
Her: HAI (Yes)!

[we were smiling and clapping with joy] Her and I witnessed her daughter's first steps!!!

Me: [to her daughter] GOOD JOB!
Me: [to her] OMEDETOU, OMEDETOU (congratulations)!!!
Her: Thank you!
ME: I am sorry your husband didn't see!

We laughed and shared the moment of joy together. It felt like my heart had tripled!

We visited for a total of 1.5 hours before I said that I should return home. She translated into her phone, "Please come back many times." I told her that I would and asked their names again. I apologized for having a hard time remembering names. She said, "Please ask again and again. Everyday [I am] here."

I still cannot remember her name, but I cannot forget these moments I shared with my beautiful neighbor. God, in His infinite goodness, has given me more than I deserve and more than exactly what my heart needs every day. How can He give me such an authentic experience when her and I could hardly communicate? Minutes after I felt the twinge of loneliness, He sent my neighbor. For all the firsts I've had here, I was able to share a first with her. For two months, we have been living next to each other. I have been learning Japanese to communicate, and she had been learning English. I really can't express in words the magnitude of this answer to prayer. Does that even make sense? Have you ever felt that way? My heart has its cry, but my mind tells me it's not possible and that my cries can't be answered. My prayers are so simple. His answers are bigger than words.

"Lord, I am lonely." He says, "You are not alone. I am preparing someone for you."

My heart says, "Lord, no one here wants to know me." He says, "Yes they do, and she tried to come meet you, not once, but twice."

I think, "Lord, I am sad." He says, "I will bring you much joy through others, you will share in their joy."

I say, "Lord, I cannot. I cannot communicate." He says, "Neither can your neighbor, but she will take a first step to show you it is possible."

I say, "Lord, do people here really care for me?" He says, "Yes, and she is learning a new language so she can tell you."

I say, "God, will I have true friends?" He says, "Yes, you will have friends. But first, know that I am your true friend, and I will remind you that I am here always by answering your prayers and reviving your spirit."

I say, "God, does anyone love me?" He says, "I love you, and I will answer your prayers exactly, specifically, and better than you can ever imagine."

For all the words that I have spoken above, today was bigger than words. This experience may seem simple, but it has overflowed my heart with reverence and my eyes with tears.

"To the only God our Savior be glory, majesty, power, and authority, through Jesus Christ our Lord, before all ages, now and forevermore! Amen." (Jude 1:25)

Love always,
Amy